41 - Pretty Coloured Holes and Gemma Atkinson…

I’ve been away, did you miss me? No? Bastards! I’ve been on a training course to learn how to ‘Maintain and Administer a Windows 2003 Server Environment’ – it was as interesting as it sounds – so I haven’t had much time to play golf. Actually, I have had NO time to play golf. I have had a chance to read Golf Whine Monthly though which is turning me on more and more.

From the looks of things the new equipment for next year is released in the autumn meaning the magazines are filled with obscenely attractive woods, shiny new clubs, pornographic wedges, alien looking putters and funky arsed bags. Some of the pages of my magazines are stuck together…but I don’t really want to go into that right now.

Golf clubs look good in my opinion. I like the shape of simple blade clubs, the minimalist design and the focus on the materials. Tell you what though, cavity backed clubs are the fucking shit! Have you seen some of the stuff coming out? The fact that there is a gaping wound in the back of the club seems to inspire the designers to go mad…or to just fill them with pretty colours to hoike in the morons. Hmmm…

Needless to say, just about every manufacturer has a new set of woods, irons, putters and wedges for 2009. All look fantastic but some more fantastic than others. By now you lot must know that I can’t go a whole article about equipment without talking about the Titleist Vokey wedges.

I have dark thoughts when I think of the Vokey; I want them more than Gemma Atkinson (right - feel free to click on the image for a better look) oiled up wearing nothing but a smile! Actually that is bollocks.

I need a cold shower…and a 56* Titleist Vokey with the oil can finish. If everyone who read this blog gave me £1 it would go some way towards me buying one. Unfortunately, seeing as there are only about five of you out there reading it, it would be a very short way. Never mind, I can see a Christmas present to myself coming up.

Anyway, not only does the Vokey look the absolute business, it is also the best wedge you can buy according to Golf Whine Monthly. In a recent group test with five other wedges from the likes of Callaway and TaylorMade it stood head and shoulders above the competition to receive one of the highest marks ever given. Due to the extra choice of shaft stiffness it has gone from one of the very best to THE very best.

See, and you lot thought I wanted one because it has a cool bronze finish which wears away until the club starts rusting to give it a battered ‘junk yard dog’ look. Ooops, I think I need another cold shower…