Arnold Palmer is the biggest crowd-pleaser since the invention of the portable sanitary facility. - Bob Hope
When John Daly hits an iron he takes a cubic yard of Kent as well. His divots go further than my drives. - David Feherty
A triple bogey is three strokes more than par, four strokes more than par is a quadruple bogey, five more than par is a quintuple, six is a sextuple, seven is a throwuple, eight is a blowuple, and nine is a ohshutuple. - Henry Beard
Golf and masturbation have at least one thing in common. Both are a lot more satisfying to do than they are to watch. - Anon
The only thing gonna stick around that hole (14th at Pebble Beach) is a dart! Yesterday I was on in three, off in four. They oughta put one of them miniature windmills on this thing and charge 50 cents to play it. - Lee Trevino
Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious. - P. G. Wodehouse
Trousers are now allowed to be worn by ladies on the course. But they must be removed before entering the clubhouse. - Sign at an Irish golf club
(After hitting two balls into the water) By God, I've got a good mind to jump in and make it four. - Simon Hobday
Hit the ball hard and straight and not too often. - Anon
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. - Tiger Woods
Showing posts with label David Feherty. Show all posts
Showing posts with label David Feherty. Show all posts
Friday, 23 July 2010
Monday, 24 August 2009
99 - Quote/Unquote...
In 1981, Tom Sieckmann won the Philippine Open, the Thailand Open and the Singapore Open, leaving him second only to the US Marines for victories in the Pacific. - Gary Nuhm
I'd like to see the fairways more narrow. Then everybody would have to play from the rough, not just me. - Seve Ballesteros
The greens (at Winged Foot Golf Club, New York) are harder than a whore's heart. - Sam Snead
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. - George Deukmejian
Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you're the best. - Jack Nicklaus
Golf. You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner buys the drinks. - Anonymous
Why am I using a new putter? Because the old one didn't float too well. - Craig Stadler
They say I'm famous for my chip shots. Sure, when I hit 'em right, they land just so, like a butterfly with sore feet. - Lee Trevino
I was swinging like a toilet door on a prawn trawler. - David Feherty
By the time you get to your ball, if you don't know what to do with it, try another sport. - Julian Boros
I'd like to see the fairways more narrow. Then everybody would have to play from the rough, not just me. - Seve Ballesteros
The greens (at Winged Foot Golf Club, New York) are harder than a whore's heart. - Sam Snead
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. - George Deukmejian
Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you're the best. - Jack Nicklaus
Golf. You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner buys the drinks. - Anonymous
Why am I using a new putter? Because the old one didn't float too well. - Craig Stadler
They say I'm famous for my chip shots. Sure, when I hit 'em right, they land just so, like a butterfly with sore feet. - Lee Trevino
I was swinging like a toilet door on a prawn trawler. - David Feherty
By the time you get to your ball, if you don't know what to do with it, try another sport. - Julian Boros
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