(Offering playing advice) Lay off for three weeks, and then quit for good. - Sam Snead
This is the 12th, the green is like a plateau with the top shaved off. - Renton Laidlaw
Gerald Ford - the most dangerous driver since Ben-Hur - has made golf a contact sport. There are 42 golf courses in the Palm Springs area and nobody knows which one Gerald Ford is playing until after he has teed off. It's not hard to find Gerald Ford on a golf course - just follow the wounded. - Bob Hope
Bob Hope says I have made golf a combat and contact sport. But I know I'm getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators. - Gerald Ford
(After missing a very long putt) I was on the dance floor, but I couldn't hear the band. - Chi Chi Rodriguez
Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing. - Henry Beard
(On designing golf courses) Every hole should be a difficult par and a comfortable bogey. - Robert T. Jones
Pebble Beach is so exclusive even the Samaritans have an unlisted number. - Peter Dobereiner
When I tee the ball where I can see it, I can't hit it. And when I put it where I can hit it, I can't see it. - Jackie Gleason
A golf course manager is the keeper of lawn order. - Erica H. Stux
Saturday, 31 July 2010
Thursday, 29 July 2010
163 - From Florence With Love…
Watching the British Open recently I noticed that Robert Karlsson’s clothes had a big symbol on them but I couldn’t make it out. I assumed it was his own logo as a lot of the players have their own design to identify their brand but it turns out it is the mark of exclusive clothing designers, Conte of Florence.
Conte of Florence are well know on the continent but have kept under the radar in Britain which instantly makes me interested in them (I am a bit of a snob after all). The company produces clothing for skiing, sailing as well as golf, all with that typical Italian flair.
Their gear is on the expensive side but I guess you get what you pay for, in this case it is a designer Italian garment that is seldom seen on the courses of Britain - I would pay a little more for the exclusivity the brand provides.
Interestingly the company hosts a mini golf competition in Florence every December where sponsored players hit balls from the famous Ponte Vecchio bridge down onto floating greens in the Arno river.
There are only a few online stockists selling Conte of Florence clothing (other than a eBay seller in Lithuania with designs I cannot find anywhere else on the Internet – hmmm) so I think it is going to be difficult getting my grubby little hands on some of that sweet Italian fashion.
Conte of Florence are well know on the continent but have kept under the radar in Britain which instantly makes me interested in them (I am a bit of a snob after all). The company produces clothing for skiing, sailing as well as golf, all with that typical Italian flair.
Their gear is on the expensive side but I guess you get what you pay for, in this case it is a designer Italian garment that is seldom seen on the courses of Britain - I would pay a little more for the exclusivity the brand provides.Interestingly the company hosts a mini golf competition in Florence every December where sponsored players hit balls from the famous Ponte Vecchio bridge down onto floating greens in the Arno river.
There are only a few online stockists selling Conte of Florence clothing (other than a eBay seller in Lithuania with designs I cannot find anywhere else on the Internet – hmmm) so I think it is going to be difficult getting my grubby little hands on some of that sweet Italian fashion.
Wednesday, 28 July 2010
162 - National Treasure?
There is a new, multimillion-pound Golf and Country Club opening just 6 miles away that piqued my interest so Richie and me decided to check it out. The course in question is the North West National GC, expected to open this summer in Rainford near St. Helens.
According to the disappointing official website the venue will provide “the service you’d expect in America, the laid back attitude and the relaxed atmosphere of Spain or Portugal and the hospitality of the Irish”. That is all well and good but is the course worth playing?
Plans for the parkland course started in 2004 which has resulted in 22,000 trees being planted and the creation of 12 lakes and nature reserves on the 268 acre site. In addition to the course there is also a 9 hole, par 3 academy course, an 80 bay driving range and a swanky clubhouse.
On paper it all sounds impressive but the reality is, as we found when we visited, a little different.
The course, although open to some, seems some way from being 100% with the fairways and greens needing to bed in (according to Richie’s trained eye), the 9 hole course is very basic, the driving range is uninspiring and the clubhouse is a building site (right).
To be fair, the facility isn’t actually complete so it is a little harsh to dismiss it right now. Once the plans are made into reality the NWN will be a very good venue providing a championship course, a dedicated short course, a Nevada Bob’s golf shop on site and expert tuition from the Glenn Turner Golf School.
At present there is a special introductory offer that will let you become a founder member of the club for just £1,000. Just a grand, doesn’t sound too cheap really but they apparently give the option of providing £500 up front with the remaining balance being paid over the next 12 months.
So for £85 a month I could be a member of an exclusive golf club with state of the art training facilities and fantastic club house that is just 10 minutes away from home. Play a couple of times a week and it works out that I would get all the exclusivity and pomp for the price of playing the local municipal.
According to the disappointing official website the venue will provide “the service you’d expect in America, the laid back attitude and the relaxed atmosphere of Spain or Portugal and the hospitality of the Irish”. That is all well and good but is the course worth playing?
Plans for the parkland course started in 2004 which has resulted in 22,000 trees being planted and the creation of 12 lakes and nature reserves on the 268 acre site. In addition to the course there is also a 9 hole, par 3 academy course, an 80 bay driving range and a swanky clubhouse.
On paper it all sounds impressive but the reality is, as we found when we visited, a little different. The course, although open to some, seems some way from being 100% with the fairways and greens needing to bed in (according to Richie’s trained eye), the 9 hole course is very basic, the driving range is uninspiring and the clubhouse is a building site (right).
To be fair, the facility isn’t actually complete so it is a little harsh to dismiss it right now. Once the plans are made into reality the NWN will be a very good venue providing a championship course, a dedicated short course, a Nevada Bob’s golf shop on site and expert tuition from the Glenn Turner Golf School.
At present there is a special introductory offer that will let you become a founder member of the club for just £1,000. Just a grand, doesn’t sound too cheap really but they apparently give the option of providing £500 up front with the remaining balance being paid over the next 12 months.
So for £85 a month I could be a member of an exclusive golf club with state of the art training facilities and fantastic club house that is just 10 minutes away from home. Play a couple of times a week and it works out that I would get all the exclusivity and pomp for the price of playing the local municipal.
Tuesday, 27 July 2010
161 - Won't Go Blind...
I love playing in the sun but I’m not a fan of being blinded by it. To save my retinas I decided to invest in a pair of decent sunglasses, which inevitably meant looking to one of the best names in the business, Oakley. If you are going to do it do it properly eh?
I went for a pair of Oakley Fives Squared (below) but was wary of buying expensive eyewear as sunglasses are just sunglasses right? Wrong. The difference between the Fives Squared and my old glasses from NEXT was like chalk and cheese.
Oakley has a long tradition of designing and producing exceptional eyewear and this heritage can be felt in the relatively modestly priced Fives Squared. The Oakley’s seem to fit better than the fashion glasses as they wrap around my face as opposed to sitting on my nose.
But the design isn’t the best part of the glasses, that honour goes to the lenses which block out the harmful, distracting rays providing a brilliant view of the course ahead. Taking them off after wearing them for a while left me dazzled for a couple of seconds, a tribute to the quality of the optics.
The only minor niggle I have with the glasses is the feel of the materials, they seem more plastic than premium but I guess there has to be a compromise somewhere at this price.
Oakley produces a lot of different styles of glasses but what drew me to the Fives Squared was the fact that they look the part both on and off the course. In my opinion some of the more focused designs make the wearer look like a Tour de France competitor missing a bike!
So am I happy with the Oakley’s? Definitely, they work perfectly and are cool enough to wear every day. They also have the smug factor about them that appeals to the anti-snob in me who likes to rub the establishment up the wrong way – always a good thing in my book!
I went for a pair of Oakley Fives Squared (below) but was wary of buying expensive eyewear as sunglasses are just sunglasses right? Wrong. The difference between the Fives Squared and my old glasses from NEXT was like chalk and cheese.
Oakley has a long tradition of designing and producing exceptional eyewear and this heritage can be felt in the relatively modestly priced Fives Squared. The Oakley’s seem to fit better than the fashion glasses as they wrap around my face as opposed to sitting on my nose.
But the design isn’t the best part of the glasses, that honour goes to the lenses which block out the harmful, distracting rays providing a brilliant view of the course ahead. Taking them off after wearing them for a while left me dazzled for a couple of seconds, a tribute to the quality of the optics. The only minor niggle I have with the glasses is the feel of the materials, they seem more plastic than premium but I guess there has to be a compromise somewhere at this price.
Oakley produces a lot of different styles of glasses but what drew me to the Fives Squared was the fact that they look the part both on and off the course. In my opinion some of the more focused designs make the wearer look like a Tour de France competitor missing a bike!
So am I happy with the Oakley’s? Definitely, they work perfectly and are cool enough to wear every day. They also have the smug factor about them that appeals to the anti-snob in me who likes to rub the establishment up the wrong way – always a good thing in my book!
Monday, 26 July 2010
160 - The New Silver...
It seems that white is the new silver when it comes to putters. TaylorMade have produced a new family of ‘Ghost’ putters that are earning rave reviews in the golfing press and are being used to great effect by the tour pros, most noticeably Graeme McDowell and Justin Rose.
McDowell used the new putter to help him win both the Welsh Open at Celtic Manor and the US Open at Pebble Beach recently with Rose picking up his first PGA Tour win at the Memorial Tournament, which took place at the Muirfield Village Golf Club, Dublin, Ohio, USA.
The Rossa Corza Ghost (to give it its full name) is a stunning thing to behold, from its glorious white finish to its three alignment lines and innovative hole in the head it certainly stands out. Rumour is that TaylorMade have plans to extend the range to produce a Ghost for every player.
One player who obviously likes the idea of a white putter if not the design of the Corza Ghost is Sergio Garcia (right) who has had his usual putter ‘blancoed’.
The Ryder Cup star was spotted at the US Open using a white blade putter sparking rumours that TaylorMade were about to release a white Anser type wand.
According to the manufacturer that isn’t really the case. Garcia, as a TaylorMade/Adidas staff player, asked for a specially produced white version of his normal Rossa Daytona putter and the company duly obliged.
Golf Whine Monthly reviewed the Corza Ghost as part of a 42 club round up and it received a Gold Award, finishing third in the mallet section behind another of the company’s putters, the child scaringly ugly Spider Vicino and the pretty Nike Method 003 (incidentally, the TaylorMade Daytona favoured by Garcia was runner up in the blade review).
The reviewers were impressed by TMaG’s “outside the box” thinking when it came to design and who can argue? Both the Corza and the Spider Vicino are stunning looking creations that work in the real world which is what a lot of us want.
McDowell used the new putter to help him win both the Welsh Open at Celtic Manor and the US Open at Pebble Beach recently with Rose picking up his first PGA Tour win at the Memorial Tournament, which took place at the Muirfield Village Golf Club, Dublin, Ohio, USA.
The Rossa Corza Ghost (to give it its full name) is a stunning thing to behold, from its glorious white finish to its three alignment lines and innovative hole in the head it certainly stands out. Rumour is that TaylorMade have plans to extend the range to produce a Ghost for every player.
One player who obviously likes the idea of a white putter if not the design of the Corza Ghost is Sergio Garcia (right) who has had his usual putter ‘blancoed’. The Ryder Cup star was spotted at the US Open using a white blade putter sparking rumours that TaylorMade were about to release a white Anser type wand.
According to the manufacturer that isn’t really the case. Garcia, as a TaylorMade/Adidas staff player, asked for a specially produced white version of his normal Rossa Daytona putter and the company duly obliged.
Golf Whine Monthly reviewed the Corza Ghost as part of a 42 club round up and it received a Gold Award, finishing third in the mallet section behind another of the company’s putters, the child scaringly ugly Spider Vicino and the pretty Nike Method 003 (incidentally, the TaylorMade Daytona favoured by Garcia was runner up in the blade review).
The reviewers were impressed by TMaG’s “outside the box” thinking when it came to design and who can argue? Both the Corza and the Spider Vicino are stunning looking creations that work in the real world which is what a lot of us want.
Friday, 23 July 2010
159 - Quote/Unquote...
Arnold Palmer is the biggest crowd-pleaser since the invention of the portable sanitary facility. - Bob Hope
When John Daly hits an iron he takes a cubic yard of Kent as well. His divots go further than my drives. - David Feherty
A triple bogey is three strokes more than par, four strokes more than par is a quadruple bogey, five more than par is a quintuple, six is a sextuple, seven is a throwuple, eight is a blowuple, and nine is a ohshutuple. - Henry Beard
Golf and masturbation have at least one thing in common. Both are a lot more satisfying to do than they are to watch. - Anon
The only thing gonna stick around that hole (14th at Pebble Beach) is a dart! Yesterday I was on in three, off in four. They oughta put one of them miniature windmills on this thing and charge 50 cents to play it. - Lee Trevino
Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious. - P. G. Wodehouse
Trousers are now allowed to be worn by ladies on the course. But they must be removed before entering the clubhouse. - Sign at an Irish golf club
(After hitting two balls into the water) By God, I've got a good mind to jump in and make it four. - Simon Hobday
Hit the ball hard and straight and not too often. - Anon
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. - Tiger Woods
When John Daly hits an iron he takes a cubic yard of Kent as well. His divots go further than my drives. - David Feherty
A triple bogey is three strokes more than par, four strokes more than par is a quadruple bogey, five more than par is a quintuple, six is a sextuple, seven is a throwuple, eight is a blowuple, and nine is a ohshutuple. - Henry Beard
Golf and masturbation have at least one thing in common. Both are a lot more satisfying to do than they are to watch. - Anon
The only thing gonna stick around that hole (14th at Pebble Beach) is a dart! Yesterday I was on in three, off in four. They oughta put one of them miniature windmills on this thing and charge 50 cents to play it. - Lee Trevino
Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious. - P. G. Wodehouse
Trousers are now allowed to be worn by ladies on the course. But they must be removed before entering the clubhouse. - Sign at an Irish golf club
(After hitting two balls into the water) By God, I've got a good mind to jump in and make it four. - Simon Hobday
Hit the ball hard and straight and not too often. - Anon
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. - Tiger Woods
Thursday, 22 July 2010
157 - Under The Weather...
A couple of days ago I was bemoaning the fact that I couldn’t go out and play golf in the glorious weather due to having hay fever. A quick look outside tells me that it is now just hay fever keeping me indoors as the decent weather has now well and truly disappeared. Ah well, summer was good this year, all two weeks of it.
The local media was in uproar as United Utilities imposed a hosepipe ban on the North West of England. The company blamed the lowest rainfall in 50 years for the ban claiming that the reservoirs that service this part of the country were now at 50% capacity and without significant rain we could be on the verge of a drought.
No sooner had they banned watering your rhodendrums than the weather turned and certainly not for the better. In the last two weeks we have rain broken up by drizzle followed by more rain. Ideal conditions if you happen to be a duck, rotten for the rest of us.
A spokesman for United Utilities was dragged onto the TV ironically in the middle of a downpour to explain why the ban was in place.
He was asked what he was going to do about it (save flying over some Native American’s to perform a rain dance and imposing a hosepipe ban I’m not sure what else he could do).
It seems we have got enough water but if we keep squirting it over our hyacinths there is a chance we could run out despite living in a part of the country renowned for its rain. Even with a Burkina Faso-like rainy season lasting a couple of months the ban will be in place for the foreseeable future.
I should welcome this brief change of weather with open arms. The local courses will get a good soaking which will help soften up the fairways and greens, the rain will get them back to looking their best and the smug bastards who can play in the afternoons while the rest of us are at the coalface will get routinely drenched!
Maybe suffering with hay fever now isn’t necessarily the worst thing in the world. By the time the plants have stopped spewing pollen into the air the weather should have changed again leaving me to reap the rewards of all of Mother Nature’s (and the groundskeeper’s) hard work.
The local media was in uproar as United Utilities imposed a hosepipe ban on the North West of England. The company blamed the lowest rainfall in 50 years for the ban claiming that the reservoirs that service this part of the country were now at 50% capacity and without significant rain we could be on the verge of a drought.
No sooner had they banned watering your rhodendrums than the weather turned and certainly not for the better. In the last two weeks we have rain broken up by drizzle followed by more rain. Ideal conditions if you happen to be a duck, rotten for the rest of us.
A spokesman for United Utilities was dragged onto the TV ironically in the middle of a downpour to explain why the ban was in place. He was asked what he was going to do about it (save flying over some Native American’s to perform a rain dance and imposing a hosepipe ban I’m not sure what else he could do).
It seems we have got enough water but if we keep squirting it over our hyacinths there is a chance we could run out despite living in a part of the country renowned for its rain. Even with a Burkina Faso-like rainy season lasting a couple of months the ban will be in place for the foreseeable future.
I should welcome this brief change of weather with open arms. The local courses will get a good soaking which will help soften up the fairways and greens, the rain will get them back to looking their best and the smug bastards who can play in the afternoons while the rest of us are at the coalface will get routinely drenched!
Maybe suffering with hay fever now isn’t necessarily the worst thing in the world. By the time the plants have stopped spewing pollen into the air the weather should have changed again leaving me to reap the rewards of all of Mother Nature’s (and the groundskeeper’s) hard work.
Wednesday, 21 July 2010
156 - Scotty Too Hotty…
So after a promising start with his new Nike Method 001 putter Tiger Woods ditched it for his final round at the British Open and went back to his “irreplaceable” Scott Cameron Newport 2. It looks like the Method isn’t the answer after all.
Woods used the Method 32 times on Thursday and 32 times on Friday. The figure rose to 35 on Saturday, which prompted the world number one to go back to the putter that has won him 14 majors and around $90m over the years although it didn’t quite work out this time.
Woods said: "The greens are a little bit faster than they were the first day, I just didn't feel comfortable with my speed, so I went back to my old putter."
Despite only playing 27 putting strokes on the final round with the Newport 2, the three time Open winner finished the day with an even par 72.
This left him at 3-under for the tournament, tied for 23rd, 13 strokes behind Louis Oosthuizen and he was under no illusion what part of his game let him down.
"I drove it great all week, hit my irons pretty good, and I did not putt well except for the first day," said Woods. "I believe I had nine three-putts for the week, so consequently, I'm pretty far down the board."
I guess that is the end for the Method then? The 001 was supposed to give him the edge on slower greens but it never appeared he was more effective with his Scotty Cameron.
I’m not sure what Nike will make of this decision, as they were no doubt hoping to sell thousands of putters to fanboys desperate to look like Woods on courses all over the world but with him ditching their flat stick they are going to lose an awful lot of potential revenue.
Woods used the Method 32 times on Thursday and 32 times on Friday. The figure rose to 35 on Saturday, which prompted the world number one to go back to the putter that has won him 14 majors and around $90m over the years although it didn’t quite work out this time.
Woods said: "The greens are a little bit faster than they were the first day, I just didn't feel comfortable with my speed, so I went back to my old putter."
Despite only playing 27 putting strokes on the final round with the Newport 2, the three time Open winner finished the day with an even par 72. This left him at 3-under for the tournament, tied for 23rd, 13 strokes behind Louis Oosthuizen and he was under no illusion what part of his game let him down.
"I drove it great all week, hit my irons pretty good, and I did not putt well except for the first day," said Woods. "I believe I had nine three-putts for the week, so consequently, I'm pretty far down the board."
I guess that is the end for the Method then? The 001 was supposed to give him the edge on slower greens but it never appeared he was more effective with his Scotty Cameron.
I’m not sure what Nike will make of this decision, as they were no doubt hoping to sell thousands of putters to fanboys desperate to look like Woods on courses all over the world but with him ditching their flat stick they are going to lose an awful lot of potential revenue.
Tuesday, 20 July 2010
155 - Louis The 16th…
All hail Louis the sixteenth! Actually he is Louis Oosthuizen and he finished sixteen under but that doesn’t sound as good, does it? The little known South African came to St Andrews and blew the rest of the field away with a fine display over the four days.
Oosthuizen shot rounds of 65, 67, 69 and 71 to take the title finishing 7 shots ahead of Lee Westwood in second. He got lucky on the second day when he got a good round in before the weather turned forcing the tournament to be suspended for a short time.
2010 Andalucia Open champion kept his nerve on the final round to ease to a drama free victory “It was unbelievable, said Oosthuizen. “After the 12th it became a bit difficult, having such a big lead, to stay calm and focused, but I’m glad I had an eight-shot lead on the 17th tee!
“I kept cool and calm the whole way but it's probably going to hit me tomorrow or next week what I’ve done.”
The contest was effectively over when the 27-year-old rolled in a 40-foot putt for an eagle on the par four 9th, just as playing partner Paul Casey was starting to apply some pressure.
Before his victory at St Andrews, Oosthuizen had struggled in his previous outings in the Open; in fact he had not made the cut in his last three attempts.
Oosthuizen is the latest South African major champions following Bobby Locke, who won at St Andrews in 1957, Gary Player, who won three Opens in three different decades, three-time major winner Ernie Els, double US Open champion Retief Goosen and 2008 Masters victor Trevor Immelman.
Oosthuizen shot rounds of 65, 67, 69 and 71 to take the title finishing 7 shots ahead of Lee Westwood in second. He got lucky on the second day when he got a good round in before the weather turned forcing the tournament to be suspended for a short time.
2010 Andalucia Open champion kept his nerve on the final round to ease to a drama free victory “It was unbelievable, said Oosthuizen. “After the 12th it became a bit difficult, having such a big lead, to stay calm and focused, but I’m glad I had an eight-shot lead on the 17th tee!“I kept cool and calm the whole way but it's probably going to hit me tomorrow or next week what I’ve done.”
The contest was effectively over when the 27-year-old rolled in a 40-foot putt for an eagle on the par four 9th, just as playing partner Paul Casey was starting to apply some pressure.
Before his victory at St Andrews, Oosthuizen had struggled in his previous outings in the Open; in fact he had not made the cut in his last three attempts.
Oosthuizen is the latest South African major champions following Bobby Locke, who won at St Andrews in 1957, Gary Player, who won three Opens in three different decades, three-time major winner Ernie Els, double US Open champion Retief Goosen and 2008 Masters victor Trevor Immelman.
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