87 - Quote/Unquote...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him. - Bob Hope

Our guess is that the inventor of scopolamine, the truth-forcing drug, grew weary of listening to golf scores. - Colorado Springs Gazette

Some guys get so nervous playing for their own money, the greens don't need fertilising for a year. - Dave Hill

I don't care to join any club that's prepared to have me as a member. - Groucho Marx

Some players would complain if they had to play on Dolly Parton's bedspread. - Jimmy Demaret

I'm hitting the driver so good, I gotta dial the operator for long distance after I hit it. - Lee Trevino

According to locker-room lore, the name golf arose by default - all the other four-letter words had already been taken. - George Pepper

Any game where a man 60 can beat a man 30 ain't no game. - Burt Shotten

Golf is an ineffectual attempt to direct an uncontrollable sphere into an inaccessible hole with instruments ill-adapted to the purpose. - Sir Winston Churchill

It's not polite to pick up a lost ball before it stops rolling. 
- Anonymous